Chinese Character （猜字谜）

★、山上还有山（出）
★、一个礼拜。（旨）
★、一人一张口，下面长只手。（拿）
★、一人在内。（肉）
★、一人腰上挂把弓。（夷）
★、一加一。（王）
★、一口吃掉牛尾巴。（告）
★、一口咬定。（交）
★、一只牛。（生）
★、一只狗，两个口，谁遇它谁发愁。（哭）
★、一只狗四个口。（器）
★、一只黑狗，不叫不吼（默）
★、一夜又一夜。（多）
★、一大二小。（奈）
★、一字十三点，难在如何点。（汁）
★、一家十一口。（吉）
★、一斗米。（料）
★、一月一日非今天。（明）
★、一月七日。（脂）
★、一点水准。（淮）
★、一百减一。（白）
★、一边是红，一边是绿，一边怕风，一边怕雨。（秋）
★、七人头上长了草。（花）
★、七十二小时。（晶）
★、三口重叠，莫把品字猜。（目）
★、三张纸。（顺）
★、上下串通、上下难分。（卡）
★、不要讲话。（吻）
★、九只鸟。（鸠）
★、九号。（旭）
★、九点。（丸）
★、九辆车。（轨）
★、互吻。（吕）
★、五十对耳朵。（陌）
★、五口之家，旁种一树。（梧）
★、人不在其位。（立）
★、人无信不立。（言）
★、人有他则变大。（一）
★、付出爱心。（受）
★、休要丢人现眼。（相）
★、兄有债。（歌）
★、八十八。（米）
★、公而忘私。（八）
★、六十不足，八十有余。（平）
★、刀出鞘。（力）
★、十一个读书人。（仕）
★、十个哥哥。（克）
★、十二点。（斗）
★、十张口，一颗心（思）
★、十日十月（武昌起义）。（朝）
★、千里丢一，百里丢一。（伯）
★、半个人。（伴）
★、半个月亮。（胖）
★、半真半假。（值）
★、半青半紫。（素）
★、反比。（北）
★、古时候的月亮。（胡）
★、四面都是山，山山都相连。（田）
★、多一半。（夕）
★、大丈夫不得出头。（天）
★、天上无二，合去一口，家家都有。（人）
★、天天。（晦）
★、太阳西边下，月儿东边挂。（明）
★、夫人何处去。（二）
★、如箭在弦。（引）
★、存心不让出大门，你说烦人不烦人。（闷）
★、守门员。（闪）
★、家中添一口。（豪）
★、小姑娘。（妙）
★、山上复山。（出）
★、左有十八，右有十八，二四得八，一八得八。（樊）
★、差一点六斤。（兵）
★、心如刀刺。（必）
★、手提包。（抱）
★、打断念头。（心）
★、文武两全。（斌）
★、日复一日。（昌）
★、旭日东升。（九）
★、有两个动物，一个在水里，一个在山上。（鲜）
★、有人偷车。（输）
★、有心得志。（士）
★、有目共睹。（者）
★、格外大方。（回）
★、正字少一横，不作止字猜。（步）
★、水上工程。（汞）
★、点点成金（全）
★、田中。（十）
★、皇帝新衣。（袭）
★、种花要除草，一人来一刀。（化）
★、综合门市。（闹）
★、自小在一起，目前少联系。（省）
★、说它小，下边大，说它大，上边小。（尖）
★、身残心不残。（息）
★、雨落在横山上。（雪）
★、雷不雨。（田）
★、需要一半，留下一半。（雷）

Advertisements

山东琴书

傻子偷乞丐的钱包，被瞎子看到了。 　　哑巴大吼一声，把聋子吓了一跳，跛子飞起一脚…… 　　麻子说：看我的面子，算了。 　　疯子说：就是，人要有理智！ 　　这一阵子看电视剧《北方有佳人》，觉得其中的山东琴书挺有意思的。有一段是唱《反正话》的，看来是某些现代『短信息』的发源了。对语言学是没什么研究的，想来中文的多音字（相对韵律集中）可能造成用韵的方便。除了诗词专业户，即使普通老百姓都可以随口说上几句合辙押韵的俏皮话。记了电视剧中的几句词儿，在网上搜索到不同的版本。这里整理一下： 　　太阳出西落在东，中秋夜里彩霞红。 　　万里晴空下大雨，树梢不动刮台风。 　　东洋深海失了火，烧毁龙王水晶宫。 　　种颗玉米结土豆，萝卜发芽长大葱。 　　鱼儿展翅天上飞，小鸟游戏碧水中。 　　老牛比马跑得快，猫见老鼠鞠个躬。 　　跳蚤姑娘做月子，养了一窝大狗熊。 　　满天月亮一颗星，十万将军一个兵。 　　河里公鸡会下蛋，麻雀踩死大老鹰。 　　滚油锅里鱼打浪，高山顶上把船撑。 　　那边来个出殡的，抬着红花轿一乘。 　　轿里坐个小姑娘，雪白胡子飘前胸。 　　吃牛奶，喝面包，提着火车上皮包。 　　东西街，南北走，路上遇到人咬狗。 　　拿起狗来砸砖头，反被砖头咬一口。 　　说你诌，你就诌，大年五更立了秋。 　　丫丫葫芦沉到底，千斤秤砣水上漂。 　　张三吃了李四饱，撑得王五满街跑。 　　爸爸睡在摇篮里，没有奶吃向我哭。 　　记得外公娶外婆，我在轿前放爆竹。 　　半天打雷没有响，湖里石头爬上坡， 　　江中骆驼会下蛋，山上鲤鱼搭鸟窝。 　　黄河中心割韭菜，龙门山上捉田螺。 　　腊月酷热直淌汗，六月暴冷打哆嗦。 　　姐姐十五我十六，妈生姐姐我打锣。 　　我从舅舅门前过，看见小舅摇外婆。 　　黑夜作个白日梦，梦见小孩胡子多。 　　四两棉花沉了水，一副磨子泅过河。 　　耳朵看了直流泪，眼睛听了直打嗝。 参见：剧集视频 　　　分集介绍 　　　新浪资料

Battle Of Brains

Some lines (see ) from Reservation Road (2007)
★　What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a four-leaf clover?
　　带着四叶苜蓿穿越毒藤时，你会得到什么呢?
¤　A rash of good luck. (幸运皮疹)
★　What do you call a deer with no eyes? （什么是没有知识的“路”?）
¤　No i-deer. （不知“道”。）
★　What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?
　（什么是没有知识、不走正道？）
¤　Still no i-deer. （偏偏不知道）
★　If a man speaks in the middle of the forest with no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
　（如果一个男人在森林中央发表演讲又没有女人做听众，他还是错的吗?）
★　If con is the opposite of pro, then what is the opposite of progress?
　（如果“正”和“反”相对，那么“反腐”的对象是什么？）
¤　Congress! (政府)

More hard questions in life:
◆　If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
◆　Is a second hand on a clock the second, or actually the third?
◆　Is there another word for synonym?
◆　Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?”
◆　What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
◆　If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
◆　Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
◆　Why do you need a driver’s license to buy liquor when you can’t drink and drive?
◆　Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
◆　If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?
◆　If you are driving at the speed of light and turn on your headlights, what happens?
◆　Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
◆　Why is it that when you transport something by a car it is called a shipment, and when you transport something by ship it is called cargo?
◆　Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
◆　If fire fighters fight fires, and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?
◆　If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
◆　How can you get four suits for a dollar? –Buy a deck of cards.
◆　How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America? –They had reservations.
◆　What can you hold without ever touching it? –A conversation.
◆　What clothes does a house wear? –Address.
◆　What did the rug say to the floor? –Don’t move, I’ve got you covered.
◆　What do bees do with their honey? –They cell it.
◆　Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? –She couldn’t control her pupils.
◆　What do you do when your chair breaks? –Call a chairman.
◆　What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors? –A piano.
◆　What has one horn and gives milk? –A milk truck.
◆　What is a tree’s favorite drink? –Root beer.
◆　Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon? –He took them to a pignic.
◆　Why did the doughnut shop close? –The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!

More Riddles

Q: Four legs and a foot but cannot walk,
   With head without mouth cannot talk
  (四腿一脚不能走，有头无口不能言)
A: Bed (床).
Q: What has mouth but cannot talk, and has bed but cannot sleep?
  (有口不能言，有床不能睡)
A: River (河)
Q: Why did a student take a ladder to school?
A: Because he/she was going to high school!
Q: Why did the tomato blush?
A: Because she saw the salad dressing!
Q: How many apples can you eat if your stomach is empty?
A: One. Because after eating one apple your stomach isn't empty.
Q: What are the two strongest days of the week?
A: They are Saturday and Sunday. All the others are weak (week) days.
Q: Which is faster, heat or cold?
A: Heat, because you can catch a cold.
Q: Which horses have six legs?
A: All horses have forelegs (four legs) in front and two in back.
Q: What do you drop when you need it and take back when you don't?
A: Anchor.
Q. What is black when it is clean and white when it is dirty?
A: Blackboard.
Q: What has teeth but can't eat?
A: Comb.
Q: Which candle burns longer: a black one or a white one?
A: Neither. They both burn shorter.
Q: Name five days of the week without Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday?
A: The day before yesterday, yesterday, today, tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow.
Q: What has a soft bed but never sleeps, a big mouth but never speaks?
A: A river.
Q: Which eight-letter word has one letter in it?
A: Envelope.
Q: What is the center of gravity?
A: Letter V.
Q: What is Black and white and read (red) all over?
A: A newspaper.
Q: Why is number six afraid ?
A: Because seven eight nine (seven ate nine)
Q: What did zero say to eight?
A: Nice belt.
Q: What appears once in every minute, twice in every moment, 
   but not once in thousand years?
A: M
Q: Which is the left side of a cake?
A: The side has not been eaten.
Q: Why is a river rich?
A: Because it has two banks.
Q: What is you ought to keep but also give it away?
A: A promise.
Q: Where can you never tell the truth?
A: When you are lying anywhere.
Q: Why is a room full of married couples empty?
A: Because there is not a single man in the room.
Q: What table has no leg?
A: A timetable or vegetable.
Q: Why are people close to their mothers instead of their fathers?
A: Because the father is always farther (father).
Q: What question can never get answer "YES."?
A: Are you asleep?
Q: What is the beginning of everything, also the end of life?
A: E
Q: My tail is long, my coat is brown;
   I like the country, I like the town.
   I can live in a house or live in a shed;
   And I come out to play when you are in bed.
A: Mouse
Q: I sleep by day, I fly by night.
   I have no feathers, To aid my flight.
A: Bat.
Q: What kind of apple isn't an apple?
A: Pineapple
Q: What force and strength cannot get through,
   I, with a gentle touch, can do;
   And many in the street would stand,
   Were I not, as a friend, at hand.
A: Key.
Q: What lives in winter, dies in summer, and grows with its root upwards?
A: Icicle
Q: I love to dance and twist and prance,
   I shake my tail, as away I sail,
   Wingless I fly into the sky.
   Who can tell who am I?
A: Kite.
Q: What makes tears without sorrow and takes its journey to heaven?
A: Smoke.
Q: Two brothers we are, great burden we bear
   By which we are bitterly pressed;
   In truth we may say, we are full all the day,
   But empty when we go to rest.
A: Shoes.
Q: Hands she has but does not hold,
   teeth she has but does not bite,
   feet she has but they are cold,
   eyes she has but without sight.
A: Doll.
Q: At night they come without being fetched, 
   and by day they are lost without being stolen.
A: Star.
Q: The greater it is, the less you see of it.
A: Darkness.
Q: I come out of the earth and sold in the market.
   Who buys me cuts my tail and takes off my suit of silk,
   And weeps beside me when I am dead.
A: Onion.
Q: Look in my face, I am somebody; Look in my back, I am nobody.
A: Mirror.
Q: The beginning of eternity, the end of time and space;
   the beginning of every end, and the end of every place.
A: E.
Q: I open wide and tight I shut,
   Sharp am I and paper cut
   Fingers too, so do take care,
   I'm good and bad, so best beware.
A: Scissors
Q: What is it that is bought by the yard but worn by the foot?
A: Carpet.
Q: What starts with a T, ends with a T, and is full of T?
A: Teapot.
Q: What word of only three syllables contains twenty-six letters?
A: Alphabet.
Q: How to put three sixes together so as to make seven?
A: 6+6/6
Q: Why is the letter "A" like noon?
A: Because it's in the middle of the day.
Q. Why was the hearse horse hoarse?
A. Because of the coffin.
Q: Do you know why birds fly to south in the winter?
A: Because it's too far to walk there.
Q: What gets wetter as it dries?
A: A towel.
Q: What are the 3 important rings in life?
A: Engagement ring, Wedding ring, and suffering.
Q: Which room has no doors, no windows.
A: A mushroom.
Q: Why did the man throw a bucket of water out the window?
A: He wanted to see the waterfall.
Q: Why did the man throw the butter out the window?
A: He wanted to see the butterfly.
Q: Why did the man throw his watch out of the window?
A: He wanted to see time fly.
Q: Why did the man put the clock in the safe?
A: He wanted to save time.
Q: How do you spell mousetrap?
A: C-A-T.
Q: What do tigers have that no other animals have?
A: Baby tigers.
Q: Why is number six afraid ?
A: Because seven eight nine (seven ate nine)
Q: What did zero say to eight?
A: Nice belt.
Q: What is the difference between the capital of Russia and a calf's mother?
A: One is Moscow, the other is a cow's Ma.
Q: What do you call a Spaniard who can't find his car?
A: Carlos.
Q: What's the difference between electricity and lightening?
A: You don't have to pay for lightening.
Q: What do you call a witch at the beach?
A: A sandwich.
Q: Why did the traffic signal turn red?
A: You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street.
Q: Why are baseball stadiums so cool?
A: There is a fan in every seat.

黑不是白不是红黄更不是和狐狸猫狗彷佛既非家畜又非野兽
诗也有词也有论语上也有对南北东西模糊虽是短品却是妙文